tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post2507763038544839822..comments2023-05-05T02:20:39.892-07:00Comments on Cryptic Language and Vague References: Anonymous SchmanonymousOriginal Mohomiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05220176833570828412noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-14781835180687616372010-01-11T20:52:17.081-08:002010-01-11T20:52:17.081-08:00So much thought and process in the post, I really ...So much thought and process in the post, I really want to commend you on that. To me, all of this change/no change is about various ways of dealing with fear. If the majority of people on the planet accepted homosexuality as a perfectly natural phenomenon like left-handedness (as in, Oh, I just noticed you are lefthanded), we could make peace with this subject once and for all. Unfortunately, it is not just other people's fear with which we must contend but our very own.roberthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01321061879065438857noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-7758270100840416912010-01-09T10:58:04.374-08:002010-01-09T10:58:04.374-08:00Coming out was initially terrifying for me. Atten...Coming out was initially terrifying for me. Attending the first few MoHo events and firesides scared me to death, especially when someone wanted to organize a support group in my home town. I finally decided to that if I met someone at one of these events, they were likely there for the same reason I was and would not be judgmental. <br /><br />My two biggest reasons for remaining anonymous were to spare my children the possible complications and personal fear of repercussions professionally. However, I think I am finally ready to put a face to my story. <br /><br />Now that my kids have had time to process that dad is gay, and gay people are worth understanding and respect, I no longer fear for them. Professionally, I am still a bit nervous, but feel the cause is worth the potential risks. <br /><br />This year, North Star will be producing/providing much more support resources than in the past. Likely my wife and I will show up in photos or videos. I will also be speaking with local church leaders, putting a face to an issue some deny exist in their wards. <br /><br />I must admit that I'm not entirely comfortable embarking in these activities. However, I've decided that if I want change to occur in society and within the Church, and if I can help a gay young man or woman understand their worth and help them avoid some of the pain I have experienced, it will have been worth the personal discomfort.Bravonehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02762204502534599107noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-34284162052030343172010-01-08T16:40:51.062-08:002010-01-08T16:40:51.062-08:00I appreaciate the sarcasm but also recognize that ...I appreaciate the sarcasm but also recognize that this post is quite thought provoking. Unlike the race issue, it's easy to remain anonymous and hidden when you're gay. I admit, I'm not brave. I don't want to be in the limelight. I just want people to see me for who I am, which is irrespective of my sexuality. Coming out is scary, especially for gay mormons who try to live the gospel because you are subject to two communities of criticism--the ultra-conservative mormons who will think you're going to hell no matter what and the gay community that thinks you're nuts for trying to live your religion.<br />I guess I'm not brave right now because I'm not out to anyone, I want to protect my kids, and don't really want to be judged on something that's I'm not sure I understand about myself yet. In any event, for those of you out, you're awesome. We do need a voice!Criscohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13138524446101772379noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-64011256894196768742010-01-08T09:38:39.930-08:002010-01-08T09:38:39.930-08:00Lately, I've come to realize the deep desire t...Lately, I've come to realize the deep desire that other people have for those magical stories. <br /><br />Never having felt the need to seek out therapy, I went on living life. I chose not to come out to some friends who considered themselves 'SSA' and sought out that therapy because I worried about what they would think. <br /><br />As I've grown more confident and had deep discussions with these friends, I continue to find that they are not finding the satisfaction nor the solution that they feel they were promised after several years. <br /><br />The change that I see is startlingly beautiful as they accept rather than change.A Gay Mormon Boyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02366029507118022319noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-46981253756578455682010-01-07T22:55:30.414-08:002010-01-07T22:55:30.414-08:00Please don't cook Clint's pet bunny :/Please don't cook Clint's pet bunny :/blj1224https://www.blogger.com/profile/15696404108842065078noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-71648806303340954002010-01-07T18:19:49.430-08:002010-01-07T18:19:49.430-08:00Schmanonymous, glad you see the wisdom.
Boskers, ...Schmanonymous, glad you see the wisdom.<br /><br />Boskers, ha, I don't know about the reparative therapy, but I could introduce you to a few happily married couples. :-)<br /><br />Clint, I heart you. Really. I should probably never meet you because I'd fall instantly in love and it would just get complicated and ugly between us, and I'd end up cooking your pet bunny.<br /><br />Amy, I respect Ty and the Matises for what they've done, as well, even if we diverge on some points. And amen about the therapists. As for straw men, I did set some up ('cause parody and satirical jabs are fun), but notice I kept the logical arguments primarily to the actual assertions those folks have (reportedly) made. Just sayin'... :-)Original Mohomiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12887614143300677214noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-32878981310467458832010-01-07T17:59:14.855-08:002010-01-07T17:59:14.855-08:00I ran into a lot of the same disappointments when ...I ran into a lot of the same disappointments when I was young and tried to find people who had actually gone through reparative therapy and got married.Benhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08175153474572340487noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-35108509442125883022010-01-07T16:54:56.114-08:002010-01-07T16:54:56.114-08:00I supposed they'd really disapprove of the app...I supposed they'd really disapprove of the approach some of us have taken. :-)Clint Martinhttp://www.soymademegay.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-85010460281576457672010-01-07T16:51:37.493-08:002010-01-07T16:51:37.493-08:00Although, admittedly, some of this presentation wa...Although, admittedly, some of this presentation was a straw man, you do make some very valid points--the culture of shame surrounding Mormon homosexuality will disappear only if we're willing to stand against it, not cower in its darkness. I think this school of therapy is well-intentioned, though perhaps not always right. It is for this reason that I respect Ty Mansfield the Matises so much--they were willing to write a book with their real names on it, dealing with real issues. Now you can love them or hate them, agree or disagree, but golly, what they did was really brave.<br />One of the things I'm really tired of is the school of therapists who presume to speak for the Mormon homosexual community, though they themselves are straight. They sit and analyze everyone with broad, sweeping, brushstrokes, and then write articles and books that the church membership at large read. Again, I think they're well-intentioned, but wrong. Stories by real people going through real struggles are so much more powerful than the aggregate (however well-informed) perspective of their therapist.Amy Grigghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12774660002363629146noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-14691534226406390552010-01-07T15:13:55.203-08:002010-01-07T15:13:55.203-08:00I think I'm going to start going by Anonymous ...I think I'm going to start going by Anonymous Schmanonymous. It has a nice ring. I think you're on to something here.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com