tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post4429186344705501369..comments2023-05-05T02:20:39.892-07:00Comments on Cryptic Language and Vague References: My first essay on SGAOriginal Mohomiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05220176833570828412noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-42757980084899767962011-05-12T09:39:34.501-07:002011-05-12T09:39:34.501-07:00> [D]o you tell a potential fiancée about your ...> [D]o you tell a potential fiancée about your orientation. . .?<br />> Do you hold it back, never discussing it, but always live believing<br />> a huge part of you is repulsive and unacceptable to the one you<br />> are supposed to feel safest with? Or do you figure, we all<br />> have a past and skeletons in the closet, and there's no point<br />> in sharing them if nothing constructive is likely to come of it?<br /><br />Have you ever read the Thomas Hardy novel (or seen the movie<br />version of) _Tess of the D'Urbervilles_?<br />http://www.amazon.com/Tess-Special-Nastassja-Kinski/dp/B0002O7XVI/<br />(I've never read the book, but I've seen the Polanski film.)<br /><br />A beautiful peasant girl, Tess is seduced and impregnated<br />by a rich aristocrat, only to be abandoned and have her baby born<br />out of wedlock and die in infancy, denied even a Christian burial.<br />Afterward, she seems to find true love with the handsome Angel Claire,<br />who proposes marriage to her. Tess wants to come clean with<br />him about her past, but is strongly cautioned by her mother to<br />keep silent about it. When, on their wedding night, Angel confesses<br />his own past indiscretions to Tess and begs her forgiveness,<br />she readily offers what he asks, but goes on to tell him that<br />she must also beg his forgiveness for something, and then tells him<br />the story of the baby. Angel goes stony-faced and silent, pulling<br />away from her. Without a word, Tess takes off the wedding ring<br />and puts it on the table, and leaves him. (They meet again<br />before the end of Tess's life, and Angel reaffirms his love for<br />her, but it's too late, and tragedy overtakes them both,<br />in classic Hardy fashion.)<br /><br />Like Tess, I cannot imagine keeping a secret like that from<br />a potential mate. It almost frightens me to think that there<br />**are** people (and I know there are) who can compartmentalize<br />their minds to such an extent that they could pull off<br />such a deception over an extended period of time. For me,<br />it would completely compromise and distort the relationship.<br />Every declaration of love from the partner would prompt<br />a grinning skull inside my head to whisper mockingly "It's<br />based on a lie. It's all a lie."<br /><br />The ability to build a mental wall high enough to block<br />out that sepulchral voice, or to distort reality enough<br />to block it out, is completely alien to me.<br /><br />It's not a principle, or a "virtue", it's just the way I<br />am.jimfhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04975754342950063440noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-79062114043485181652010-06-09T23:21:47.284-07:002010-06-09T23:21:47.284-07:00Wow. This post probably summarizes better than mo...Wow. This post probably summarizes better than most I have read the thoughts, dilemmas, heartaches, hopes, and questions most of us who identify as religious homosexuals feel or have felt. Any open minded individual reading this would have a much better understanding of naturalness of homosexual feelings and the difficulty a homosexual faces reconciling these natural feelings with the teachings of the church. <br /><br />Wouldn't it be interesting if heterosexuals felt they had to choose between their natural affections and the spiritual teachings of their youth, and the gospel they taught and loved? <br /><br />Reading this breaks my heart for those, including me, who wrestle with such a complex issue. I feel such compassion for others who, like me, have had to make conscience decisions of the role homosexuality will play in their lives. <br /><br />Because I understand so intimately what is involved in working through these difficult issues, I have nothing but respect for those who so thoughtfully and deliberately chose a path that I may differ from mine. <br /><br />My path has been a crooked one, and yet I feel at peace with where I am in life, and feel blessed to have learned, grown, and been refined by my life experiences to date. <br /><br />My hope is that all who find themselves in this situation will one day likewise find peace in the path they choose, whatever that path may be.Bravonehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02762204502534599107noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-91717286246241580372007-05-02T22:01:00.000-07:002007-05-02T22:01:00.000-07:00Thank you for sharing that. Your family read this...Thank you for sharing that. Your family read this? Um...how did that go? <BR/><BR/>I think we are the same type of Moho/Gay by the way. Must be the rural living.Dog Crazed Brotherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11601180468167091146noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-8237051887057147902007-04-30T18:28:00.000-07:002007-04-30T18:28:00.000-07:00Gold star for using per se and spelling it correct...Gold star for using per se and spelling it correctly!<BR/><BR/>It's interesting how perspectives do change at times. I know I've changed over the years, for better, for worse.<BR/><BR/>Much to think about, for both of us.Kengo Biddleshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12083962910965544925noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-84668724547248736472007-04-29T00:31:00.000-07:002007-04-29T00:31:00.000-07:00Hey you. Intriguing post. Isn't it interesting t...Hey you. Intriguing post. Isn't it interesting to look back and see how our perspectives have changed? A year ago I would admit that my mindset was much narrower as well, although in different ways. I am so glad to know you and I will miss this summer. Keep blogging. I want to hear from you. Love...Nicholehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12254379774458667454noreply@blogger.com