tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post6306695522106236092..comments2023-05-05T02:20:39.892-07:00Comments on Cryptic Language and Vague References: There Are Better Days Ahead, SelfOriginal Mohomiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05220176833570828412noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-84405079160957394142009-06-17T22:52:02.287-07:002009-06-17T22:52:02.287-07:00Where does the answer lie? I wish I knew and could...Where does the answer lie? I wish I knew and could hand it to you.blj1224https://www.blogger.com/profile/15696404108842065078noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-85378621934843274152009-06-17T20:55:09.398-07:002009-06-17T20:55:09.398-07:00HUGHUGSaint Jobhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16187537284190617835noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-6469807723369001622009-06-17T19:54:14.885-07:002009-06-17T19:54:14.885-07:00I had to read this again, along with the full set ...I had to read this again, along with the full set of related postings that give context and background. I must say it has been very cathartic for me to review thoughts and ideas very similar to my own. What is most personal is often the most universal. <br /><br />Thanks for being willing to be so honest, personal, and thorough in documenting your relationships and the lessons you've learned. And thanks for being willing to document the ambiguities, questions, and continued yearnings you struggle with. I am touched by the poignancy of it all because it's a poignancy I live with every day.<br /><br />You have inspired me to want to write about similar episodes in my own life. I don't have a blog, so it is an exercise I will do for myself. But I may even quote some of your ideas and insights because they are so similar to my own, and they are so well expressed. It helps me, also, to know there are others out there who have been through similar situations and wrestled with a poignancy I sometimes think is uniquely my own.<br /><br />I like how you've come through it all with a strong and settled conviction that you need to cultivate a few strong relationships that may not pulsate with that same romantic excitement, but are steady and deep and comforting nonetheless. I have come to the same conclusions.<br /><br />On a related note: I hope someday that Mormon culture will celebrate male same-sex friendships in a way they do not now. The role models in scripture, and in our own history, are certainly there, but I rarely see such relationships modeled in the Mormon world I inhabit. <br /><br />Both of my "falling in love with a friend" stories relate to very straight Mormon men who are both married now. But in both cases I experienced very similar emotions and experiences as you document. And the interesting thing is that I think both of them did too, even though they are both extremely masculine and exude heterosexuality. <br /><br />In both cases we had to "break up" because Mormon life and culture doesn't know what to do with strong emotional ties between two men, especially when one of them is married. <br /><br />For me it's been heartbreaking to experience firsthand just how hostile our culture is to such relationships. And because that hostility is so pervasive, close same-sex friendships are often forced underground. And when things go underground what happens is often not good or healthy.<br /><br />(Sad stories of men who have gone underground to meet their unmet same-sex love needs are told in our community all the time.) <br /><br />I hope that those of us who are same-sex attracted, yet feel the call and claims of the restored gospel on our behavior, can find a way to pioneer covenantal relationships of great closeness with other men (and women!) both gay and straight. That is a work to which I feel called though I often have no idea where to begin in making them happen in my day to day world. <br /><br />Reading your stories strengthens my resolve somehow and gives me hope. I will keep looking for the divine fire that springs up from time to time to show me the possibilities inherent in new relationships. And I will take my lessons from the past--and the resolve and insights I've gained from them--and look to forge deeper and stronger bonds than I've yet known.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6450854270080513022.post-41439938454780723892009-06-17T13:59:37.420-07:002009-06-17T13:59:37.420-07:00This was really poignant to me. I can relate to s...This was really poignant to me. I can relate to so many of your thoughts and your experience. Thanks for sharing.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com