14 May 2007

Secret Combination of Mohos

Purple shirts with black ties? Bear your testimony in fast and testimony meeting using the word "struggle" very deliberately at least three times? The time has come for the moho establishment to arise, united, and band together. I had this epiphany today that we in the blog world may have a beautiful opportunity to determine the signs and signals to firmly declare, to those in mohodom, our strange and unusual state of being both LDS and unusually strongly attracted to members of the same sex and/or gender.

So this is a call for ideas. I personally enjoy the thought of all mohos wearing certain colors or clothes on every second Sunday. Maybe there will be signals, or code words, or anything remarkably secret combinationish. It should be distinctive but subtle enough to not scream "flaming queer". Mohos-in-the-know will recognize the signals, while the typical Joe Schmoe member will continue to be as oblivious as always.

Enough with the wondering, the second-guessing, the being convinced the person next to you in Sunday School is just in denial and will one day know, as you know, that they do, in fact, share a "special" affinity for members of the same gender. We will revolutionize the moho world by removing these barriers of suspicion and ambiguity. A new moho world order may then form.

Please, submit ideas now, and we shall subsequently vote...maybe.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Remember those cheap neon slipknot-type friendship bracelets from the 80's that had the black/neon yellow dots? Some friends and I once had a 'club' and we all wore bright pink ones to denote club membership. Some universal accessory such as that might work, and would also be good for identifying fellow mohos outside of church.

playasinmar said...

We can, in unison, shift uncomfortably in Priesthood when the teacher says we all need to be more sensitive, emotional, and caring.

You know, like the sisters.

Max Power said...

We should all wear tiaras. Oh wait, it was supposed to be something non-obvious.

How about we all wear medium blue shirts with colorful, but not clashing, green ties all purchased at Ross - I already own that outfit, and I am dead sexy in it!

Kengo Biddles said...

Maxy, does your outfit come in plus sizes? ;)

Blueyedane said...

Quick question:
What are you doing to your blog? I cannot read anything. Please, if you are going to mess with the color scheme let someone who is more adept help. thanks! Oh and yes I am all for the friendship bracelets. great idea!

Greg said...

I've got it! During testimony meeting we should draw a gospel principle from a movie that would be blatantly obvious to us, but altogether scandalous for the rest of the ward i.e. To Wong Foo... , Connie and Carla, Yentle

Craig said...

I second Danish, fix your blog! And light blue shirts with purple ties. Much sexier. I hate black shirts. I also like the blue/green combo.

And what exactly do you mean by "sex and/or gender"?

Kengo Biddles said...

Darling! Darling!! Chins up, boobs out, it's SHOW TIME! ;)

chedner said...

I'm kind of traditional when it comes to what I wear to Church: white shirts for me...

I recommend scratching the left-hand's thumb-pad with the nail of the left-hand's ring finger... with a slight limp to the wrist, of course...

Greg said...

Kengo, you just made my day.

Stephalumpagus said...

You should design a tie that says, "LDS" and "SSA" all over it in a cool design. That way Deseret Book could sell them to Mohos all over the country. Plus we could purchase them as gifts for those who are still in denial.