08 February 2011

A door closed, but...

...windows are opened.

Reconnecting with an old friend. Allowing myself to be vulnerable to someone whom I had pushed away and remembering that we are, in fact, good friends, even if not perfectly so (who is?).

Knowing that it's possible to be over someone, even if it's taken a couple of years.

Letting go of hatred and resentment for whatever has possessed someone I more recently loved and wishing him well as we both move on.

Meeting people who spark a tentative hope that perhaps there are, after all, other viable options. And feeling sparks of chemistry and potential compatibility I'm not yet ready to trust or act on but am glad I can smirk about as I shake my head while exploring it tentatively and considering the possibility of being a fool all over again sooner or later.

Feeling strength in convictions and clarity of thought. Feeling motivated in personal goals and looking forward to upcoming endeavors and personal and social plans. Feeling optimistic, even if somewhat tentatively, about most aspects of life.

Feeling peace, hope, love, longsuffering, renewed strength, light, patience...in my religious days, I would have described this as feeling "very blessed" or "buoyed by the Spirit". Naturally, some of it is coming off of a week of physical illness and an emotionally hard weekend and feeling 'better'. But whatever the semantics or explanations, it's nice.


Bravone said...

Sweet! This makes me smile. I'm sure the most exciting upcoming social event you are looking forward to is an ethnic night at my place with shared friends, right? :)

jimf said...

> Feeling peace, hope, love, longsuffering, renewed strength, light, patience...

Do not drive or use heavy machinery while under the influence of this
state. ;->