21 February 2008

Breast Preference

So I got together with the fam recently, and we were all sitting around the dinner table, my brother and his family, my parents, and myself. We were eating spaghetti with pieces of chicken cooked in the sauce. I took a smaller piece, not being very hungry. But it turned out to be darker meat, and I prefer light meat when it comes to poultry.

I commented that the piece I had taken was dark meat and offered it to the first taker. My mom said she'd take it (not just motherly self-sacrifice--she actually likes the stuff...weird) and said to look in the sauce for more. "There should be some breasts left. I made sure to put in plenty 'cause I know you prefer breasts."

My brother, grinning wryly, quickly quipped, "Apparently not, we've learned." And there was much laughter.

Later that evening, the subject of an old breast pump came up and the comedy of using such a contraption (I won't even go into that, but let's just say they were talking piston-driven suction), along with the necessity of using them when babies won't breastfeed. My mother commented that when I was a baby, she had to find ways to feed me because I wouldn't nurse. I always fell asleep.

...now, would you pass up this opportunity? I sure wouldn't. I said, "Wow. Bored from a really early age." And there was much laughter.

Breast jokes are fun.

12 comments:

Potentate said...

=)

I love it.

Abelard Enigma said...

Was this you?

Original Mohomie said...

** Regarding Abelard's link **

NIPPLE WARNING: While I wrestle with the puritanical dilemma of whether to leave Abelard's link up, just be warned that the link does involve a non-erotic image of breastness, complete with nipple. I'm actually not kidding, here, so be warned that if you don't want to see an exposed breast or maybe want to a little too much (you know who you are), don't click on it. If seeing exposed nipplage in a breastfeeding context is OK to you, then click away, baby...

Kengo Biddles said...

Of course, you know, O-Mo, this is just further proof of your gayness, because you weren't a breastfeeder as a child... :)

Abelard Enigma said...

Wow, my comment came with a warning label. That's a first.

Although, I would think that for most of the people who read this blog, the reaction would be more of repulsion rather than titillating. :)

BTW, I'm a breast man too - we are still taking about chicken, aren't we?

Although, your story does remind me of a conversation my wife and I had once. A new restaurant had opened in the area called Bone Daddy's and I commented that we should try it out some time. My wife responded that she had heard that they have scantily clad waitresses, like Hooters. To which I responded "trust me, if I go there - it will be for the food."

Danish Boy said...

Um... It would have been so kind of you to put your comment about the nature of the picture before abelards link (if that's even possible). Imagine the look an my face(Thank goodness I was alone). Also it is very difficult to find the red x when you are looking away from the screen. Yes I may be danish but that doesn't mean I enjoy non-erotic nudity.

Needless to say I will not be impulse clicking on anymore links about breast feeding. I should have known better. Ha ha! :-)

Anonymous said...

(O-Mo, if I accidentally sent this to you a million times, I'm sorry. Just delete all but one of them. For some reason it doesn't seem to be sending properly.)

You remind me how much I love "Dad Labs."

WARNING: This link does involve non-erotic images of male nippleness. I'm actually not kidding, here, so be warned that if you don't want to see an exposed male nipple or maybe want to a little too much (you know who you are), don't click on it. If seeing exposed nipplage in an experimental breastfeeding-sympathetic context is OK to you, then click away, baby...

Sorry O-mo, couldn't help myself. :)

~A Girl You Know (it wouldn't let me type in the name below?!)

Original Mohomie said...

Ha ha! Danish Boy, you were the first person who came to mind when I wrote the disclaimer. I could just picture your face, especially if you opened it at work. And I thought about adding a disclaimer before it, but I don't know how. Sucker!!!

Girl I Know, I'm a little hesitant to check out the link you posted here at work, but I'll be sure to do so later. I can only imagine...

Danish Boy said...

Don't worry. I already checked it and the link is bad. It was a hoax although I must say I have now mastered the art of clicking on a link and immediately going to the exit button just in case it is something inappropriate for work. My curiosity is quite strong.

Thanks for thinking of me when you commented. It was probably good for me anyways. :-)

Original Mohomie said...

Here's the correct link.

A Girl You Know said...

A hoax???

(Side-note Lactavist Soap Box)
Anyway, as a mother who breastfed her almost-now-two year old son until last month, when her now pregnant self was too sensitive to take it anymore, I look forward to the day when Good people who believe in raising Strong Healthy families to not place any shame on breastfeeding. I find it very short sighted when (mostly LDS males, from my experience) people are offended at the sight of the healthiest action for babies and mothers.

(Soap box done. Continue with your normal lives.)

Post-It Boy said...

I don't understand interest in breasts. How do women handle those things? Carrying them around day after day... They'd annoy me far too much.

But, I think women think the same thing about our equipment. So probably averages out.